As couples that consist of older men and younger women become more prevalent, we are eventually confronted with the question: why do older men want to date younger women. The obvious answer is that younger women are more attractive physically and sexually than women who are much older. This may be unfair, but it is a simple fact that men, younger or older, are attracted to women in their twenties and thirties, women who are at their physical and sexual peak years. Be this as it may, this answer is just too simple to cover the motivations of all older men looking for younger women.
For many men who find themselves single and available in their forties, fifties, or even sixties there are just not that many available women their own age. Most women in their forties or fifties are married or otherwise taken. For a man who may be recently divorced there are few options. It is a plain fact that there are more single women in their twenties and thirties who are actively looking to meet a potential partner. Often older men become primarily interested in younger women because these are the women who are actively dating and searching for romantic partners. And younger women benefit from this because older men tend to be far less self-absorbed and egotistical and are much more secure in themselves (Mid-day.com). In this way, both partners find satisfaction with these matches.
Another factor for older men is that many older women who have been married and been through long term relationships that ended for one reason or another tend to be hardened to the romance that many of these men seek. These women, by no fault of their own, are jaded on relationships. They no longer see the magic in romance in quite the same way as their younger counterparts and a good many of these men yearn for the kind of passion that comes from romance. Many older women are more inclined to seek friendships than romantic relationships, and older single men are looking for the package that dating and relationships promise. They want companionship and friendship, but they also want romance and sex. Many older women are just not interested in getting this involved.
While women who are of a similar age as these older men share common life experiences in many respects (they listened to the same music, saw the same movies, etc.) this should in no way indicate that younger women will not relate to the life experiences of an older man in ways that are just as meaningful as his age peers. As a recent article in Telegraph points out: “lack of experience does not imply lack of empathy” (Kent). In fact, girls looking for older men are quite likely excited by the experiences their older partner brings to the relationship.
Certainly there are men who want the eye candy and the trophy wife. These men have always existed and they always will. But these men are the minority and most of these men were after the same type of vapid relationships when they were younger. That these types of men tend to make news should come as no surprise because they make perfect tabloid fodder. What the tabloids do not publicize is the simple romance and commitment that a good many older men are after and find in younger women.
Kent, Caroline. The Telegraph. October 23, 2013.
Mid-Day.com. May 30, 2022.